Ummm, well, ummm

So my dear readers and friends, are you ready to come flog me? After you read this, you just might be!

So I cancelled on my boyfriend for Saturday night because I was pissed at him for doing what his roommates wanted and I really didn’t want to meet them. Yesterday, he and I spoke (via text) and I felt bad for canceling although I had an enjoyable evening at home ordering pizza and watching old movies on tv. So I asked if he could come out thinking he would have to ask permission and I would dump him if I heard those words.
Gay boyfriend (GB) called and asked if he and I could go eat. I told him my boyfriend was coming but before then would be great. So GB came over and we went to our favorite restaurant but they had changed management and the name of the place. We decided to try it out anyway. Same foods, same prices, so it was good. My boyfriend met us up at the restaurant as we had just finished paying and had walked outside. We all chatted and went by my house to grab food for my boyfriend which I had told him I had cooked and he wanted to try. Boyfriend had a piece of my lasagna and a pumpkin brownie and said they were great. We took GB back to his car and chatted more. Then boyfriend and I went to my local pub and had A drink (as in 1). We went to pick up his truck, take my car home, and take his truck out. Then we went and parked at a park and watched a movie on my iPad. Then he and I kissed (bunches), and he went home. He said our living situations weren’t perfect but we will figure things out. GB text me while we were at the bar and asked if I was going to dump him. I immediately hid my phone and replied that I don’t know yet and after I got home last night, chastised him since my boyfriend probably saw that text! Well, Geez, if I decide to break up with him, it shouldn’t be because GB text the wrong thing and my boyfriend saw it!

So yes, my friends, I am still with him. I asked him how he got out last night and he replied that he left them a note that he was going to his girlfriends and walked out. They weren’t home. Nobody text him last night either which was an added plus to him because they are the issue (and yes, him, for even asking them anything). Made me wonder if he said not to bother him or something. So it looks like my bitching to him about it actually helped! I asked him how he got out of basic training when he was young (he put on his FB profile he got out because of emotional issues) and he told me how his cousin died of cancer (she was 9), and that his parents lost their house and had to move, a lot of stuff hit him at the same time. So that explained that and made sense to me. GB actually liked him too, said as long as he doesn’t let his roommates walk all over him, he’s a good guy. I was happy to hear that.

So bitch at me all you want or tell me not to tell you about things with him, I understand. BUT, I will blog on how things are going. I’m happy (for now) and hope to remain that way. I’m not a controlling bitch like his roommates and it seems like he likes that. Yay!

That’s all for now on that. My dad asked me to drive his elderly friend around and that she would pay me. I can’t do that. There are days I don’t feel like I had enough time to get my stuff done plus I could never take money from her since she’s known me my whole life and I am friends with her son! So he wasn’t very happy with me this morning and then sends me a link to a military school for Little Man so I had to explain that military school or boarding school is not an option. He’s not a bad kid, he has his issues but we are working through them.

I had Sparklett’s deliver a water machine to me last week. For $20.00 a month, I can rent the machine and they will deliver three 5 gallon jugs of water plus there’s no contract. It’s awesome!!! I was going through a case of bottled water a week and since my complex won’t recycle, I hated using all that plastic. Now, we all have water whenever we want, cold, fresh, bottled water but out of a machine, plus hot water for cooking or coffee too. The best part is that I don’t have to lift the huge jug up to put it upside down on the machine. It slides into the bottom and I put a lid on it. That’s it! So cool!

I rearranged the furniture again in here because my wonderful neighbor said that I can have her hideaway couch when she gets a new one so I needed space. That’s all I wanted too. I wanted another bed in here so we would have room and wouldn’t be ruining my couch by sleeping on it nightly. And yes, that IS a good way to ruin a couch. So that’s exciting.

I cleaned, I cooked, I am getting into a pattern and I really like it. My friend said her job is hiring part time 3 days a week so I am talking to her about that. It’s not even about the money, it’s about getting out of the house a bit. I want to work, and it’s easier to find a job when you have a job, so only working 3 days a week gives me time to interview at other places, go to any appointments that I or Little Man has, and get everything else done.

Speaking of appointments, Little Man went to the dentist last week. Thank God for Medicaid! He has not one, not two or three, but 7 cavities! Holy shit! So I mention that it’s hereditary and he says “there’s no proof of that” but let me tell you, I had the same exact issues growing up. So he is having surgery this Friday where they will have to cap 4 teeth and fix 3 other cavities. He is now brushing and taking better care of his teeth because I told him unless he wants to go through this all the time, that’s what he has to do. Hopefully at his next checkup in 6 months, he won’t have more BUT if he does, then I’m sticking with the Heredity thing. He doesn’t eat candy, he doesn’t drink soda, plus he brushes like he’s supposed to and flosses? Yeah, it’s all in the family.

It’s already 1:20 in the afternoon? Holy crap, I gotta go! I have errands to run before Little Man gets home! Hugs!

The past week or so

I just realized I haven’t posted in a while! So much has not been happening. Yes, seriously. I’ve been applying for jobs, taking care of Little Man, and dealing with all the men in my life.

My closest friends have already heard this so if you are one, feel free to skip to the bottom. I spoke with the boyfriend about the cheapness. He was really good about it and we were able to work things out. I was an adult and didn’t run away! So we are still together and it’s gotten worse now.

Last night, I went to my old friend/boyfriends place where he and his wife live with their 2 small children. We were hanging out and I was talking to my boyfriend about the NES games we were playing on Facebook. He was really excited about them so I asked my friend if we could pick up my boyfriend to hang out. He said sure and off we went the 15 miles to go get him. My boyfriend drives but I really didn’t want to tell him where my friend lived so yeah, I picked him up. We were exiting the freeway when I got a text from boyfriend saying that his roommate was sending him to Walmart for some painting supplies and snacks. My first thought was “What the!?” So we met him down the street from his house and I asked him what the plan was. He said he had to go for the roommate and would then ask permission to go with us. Immediately I got pissed off but I really wanted to talk to him so we followed him to Walmart. Once we were there, we walked in and I asked him why he had to ask permission to go anywhere. I asked him a bunch of stuff about his living situation because I just don’t get it. So as my friend is scoffing about this guy and texting me that he’s got to go and I’m pulled between the two of them, I decided to tell my boyfriend straight up that he shouldn’t have to ask, he pays rent, why does he do everything for them? Why can’t one of them go since we had made plans? So then he starts defending them but says okay. So we get what the list he was given says and check out. We follow him to his place and wait. He gets in my car and I couldn’t help but pick on him. I asked if he got permission from his parents to go out and he just kind of laughed. We went back to my friends house and I share my beer with the boyfriend while the guys played old Nintendo games. I stay inside and talk to my friends wife and play with the baby who is looking at my bottle of beer like “I want that!”. So skip to a couple hours later, around 1am, and we leave their house for me to take boyfriend home. The freeway was closed so tons of traffic but more time to talk. I had 3 beers in 3 hours so I wasn’t drunk but was still in a pissy mood over his roommates. So I let it all out. “Why do you let them tell you what to do? Why do you have to ask their permission to go out when you are 42 years old? Why don’t you grow some balls and tell them when you have plans and that they aren’t going to push you around?” Yep, I went off on him. I also gave him some homemade candy and let him borrow my Nook to read the Hunger Games series. It’s password protected so he can’t buy anything, no worries! Even after I let it out on him, he wanted me to let him know when I got home. So I did. I got a text from my friend and the only thing it said was, “BREAK IT OFF NOW”. And I am starting to agree. I’m supposed to meet his roommates tonight but really don’t want to. I need some space. I’m thinking of just keeping him around until I meet someone else but that’s not fair to him. I really like him but I can’t take being with a pushover, I need a man!

So EX is taking Little Man to the auto show today so I get some time to myself which gives me time to figure out what I want to do. The only thing I want to do right now is go back to sleep! Today is my Dad’s 72nd birthday too so I’m going to see him in a bit. Hugs!

Hmmm, not sure

I had a great day today. I drove up to Conroe, TX and spent the day with friends. I guess I really needed it because I haven’t felt this relaxed in a while. I drive up and picked up my gay boyfriend and drove him to my play sisters (friend from high school) house. We went to breakfast at Denny’s with her oldest son and they had a fit over me using my gift card to pay for it. My nephew wouldn’t even eat! So our breakfast was only $38 for all of us including drinks and tip! Then we went back to my sisters and hung out until 1pm when I had to leave to pick up Little Man at school. I left my gay boyfriend at her house because her youngest said he would take him home because they live not very far from each other. He ended up staying there all afternoon too. Guess I got my cutie some new friends!

So I get Little Man and come home and his godmother calls me to let me know that she has a great idea for me. And I agree! She was talking about home schooling. She said there are lots of things to help me teach him what he “has” to know for his grade level but he doesn’t have to stop there. He gets to go at his own pace so I think he would do better with me. So I’m going to go to the teacher store and find out what I need and look up information on what to do. I think it would be good for him. He is so bored at school! And I’m at home so why not? He can go back or I can find another home schooling that he can get into if I get a job. I hate HISD and can’t afford to move at this time. So I figure I’ll give this a try.

I got a call from my boyfriend tonight. He told me that he got us our plans for Valentines Day already. His roommate gave him tickets to Alice Cooper! I’ve never seen him in concert so it sounds awesome. So he and I are going out to this thing tomorrow and maybe things will work out. I also think that maybe I need to give this more time. I do like him, he and I have a lot in common, and yeah, he’s cheap. I’m frugal, obviously not as much as he is, but I’m sure I could stand to stop spending as much. But I am going to want a t-shirt at this concert and I’m going to buy one! I’m not even going to ask him, I’m just getting one for me. Also, he’s already planned for me to come to his place next weekend to stay with him and meet his roommates. I’m not staying there tomorrow because he didn’t ask his roommates so they said no, not until they meet me which is understandable. So I’m safe to take more time to figure out what I want and if I want to continue it which I really want to try. Yes, I’m worried that he will never be able to live in his own with his part time job that doesn’t pay much but you know, we are just starting out so I am going to take my time and see what happens!





Very sad day

So found out that he’s not my father. My bio moms friend said the only other person it could be was this Native American guy but he died of AIDS a long time ago because he was a drug user.

I’ve been really sad today, I was just getting used to the idea of this guy being my father. So no worries, I’ll write more at some point this week. I’m just too upset to write more.


How I can’t tell you, maybe because I stuck to my plan (for the most part) or maybe because it’s that time of the month, but I’m back down to 205.8!!! I am SO not complaining! I only went over twice this week, one day by 300 and something calories and one day by 47 calories. I’ve been trying to walk more. I’ve also been busy talking to my boyfriend instead of eating. That might be it too, the joys of new love and all.

So I joined the Houston Astronomical Society today. Cost $38 for the year and I’ll get to go star viewing at their site any time I want! I’m excited. I can take Little Man or my boyfriend with me too.

So I dyed my hair and did my nails yesterday, actually did something for myself! Amazing, right? And then talked to my boyfriend for like 4 hours via messaging. I got a message from him this morning and was thinking, “wow, he really likes to talk!” So I’m trying to not say anything to him, I just need to not talk so much so we have stuff to talk about on Saturday! We have an 85 mile drive so we will need stuff to talk about. But I guess I need to calm down about it. It’s a good thing he likes to talk!

Okay so I just freaked him out and it’s a bit sad. I have to drive 30 miles to pick him up, 85 miles each way to the place, then 30 miles home the next morning. I told him that I’m glad that gas prices are down since it’s so far for me to drive and his reply was just “yes, it’s good”. So I straight up asked him to help out with gas and didn’t tell him about me paying half or anything else I wanted to say like “you couldn’t offer to help?”. 2 minutes later, he replies that he has to check his bank account and he needs gas for his suv for the next week to go to work. Really? That’s your reply? So I said I’m talking about each of us put in $10 to fill my tank up, nothing else and he replies “Oh I can handle that”. Omg dude, really? So what would happen if I didn’t have any gas to come see you? Would you cancel on me cause you need to save money for the next week and can’t pick me up? So I’m trying to not totally go off on him since its a new relationship (plus I’m in total PMS mode) and I let him know that my filter on not saying what I want isn’t there and I will always be up front, honest, and speak my mind. I also said I know he isn’t wealthy (I didn’t mention I know what he makes) and that I wouldn’t ask him for anything that’s not needed. He replies with “ok hon”. I really hope he’s not as bad as he is making himself out to be. If he is, this relationship which is just starting, will crash and burn! I don’t even have a f’ing job and I drive all over the city on Saturday for him and paid for our dinner at a nice place! Wth? Help me out here folks, I am not attached yet so I need advise! He’s a great guy, we have a lot in common, but he’s cheaper than I am!

On another subject, we woke up late this morning. I guess I didn’t even hear my alarm because it was on! I woke up at 8:50 and the school takes attendance at 9. I woke Little Man up and decided to just keep him home since he would be counted absent anyway. We did school work for 4 hours, took a lunch break and walked to get pizza, then came back and he cleaned his room (how I wanted) and now I am letting him do what he wants. It’s been a pretty good day with him. I hated him missing school but oh well! He did geometry (in 4th grade?!?), social studies, reading comprehension, and he read a book for a while. He hasn’t eaten since breakfast and says he’s not hungry yet but he has pizza for whenever he does get hungry.

So I’m back to getting my stuff done, just helped a neighbor jump start his suv, and checked but the dna results still aren’t done yet but are in processing. We shall see!


Well oops

So yeah, I know I was not going to have any more nicotine or caffeine but that hasn’t happened. At least I gave up the energy drinks I was having 2 of every day! That’s a definite good start!

As of Friday, I weigh 208. Woo hoo! 3.4 pounds gone already! The first week is usually the easiest since you tend to get rid of water weight so we will see what this Friday brings!

Today, I applied for jobs at 3 different Costco’s. Yeah, working evenings and weekends will be tough but I need a job! I kind of don’t want it because of those reasons but they pay really well and have major holidays off. I am going to apply with a temp service this week too. I hate them but when you want to work, you do what you have to do. My BOYFRIEND is the sweetest thing ever so far! My parents are keeping Little Man for me one night this weekend so I can go see him. Who knows, maybe he’ll ask me to stay over! And no, we already said no sex until after our 6th date so if I did stay with him, it would be making out and actually sleeping. Plus this weekend I’ll be on my cycle so sex will NOT happen! But I have a hard time waiting for something I want and he’s so not helping with the makeout sessions we’ve had! And he said at least he has his own bedroom and can “take care of himself” (only because I said I didn’t want him to have blue balls). He said he felt bad that I didn’t have that option with Little Man and his dad here with no privacy. Umm, thanks? Lol, I just agreed with him. I wasn’t sure what to say!

So yeah, all is well here. I am enjoying the fact that I have a boyfriend since even engineer never asked me to be his girlfriend, I was always his mistress. I can’t believe I stayed with that loser for 4 years!

It’s been a week!

Well, I’m looking for a job daily as well as dealing with Little Man’s school problems and the EX. Yep, nothing has changed. With the exception of my date! We had our 2nd date yesterday which ended up being 12 hours long and NO sex!

We went to a couple of free museums, I took him to eat, then we went to see The Gambler which was not as good as I thought it would be. It was awesome! We made out for an hour at the end of our date and have made plans to see each other next weekend if I can get my parents to keep Little Man one night. The only issue yesterday was EX.

Before my date came to my house at lunch time, I had to clean up around here. Why, when EX knew the guy was coming over, did he leave his boots and sleeping shorts out? So I was pissed that I had to clean up after him in the beginning. EX took Little Man to the museum of Natural Science for 2 scout classes to earn badges and when my date got here, we watched Gabriel Iglesias on Netflix and ate lunch. We kissed for a bit but we had to go get out of the house so I wouldn’t do anything stupid. The we went to the Lawndale Art Center which I wasn’t too impressed with

and then went to the Menil Collection and I loved it!

We found a couple empty rooms and kissed there but not hot and heavy like, just like a “I want to let you know I like you” kisses. I found out a lot about him like his last relationship was for 15 years and he thinks EX is a douchebag as well as a cheater. He gets angry but knows how to control it, he gets bored but instead of saying he’s bored, he does something else.

After that, we drove to Pappadeaux seafood restaurant and I treated him to a nice dinner. He had fried shrimp and catfish and I had a baked potato that I couldn’t even finish! I had an apple-tini and he had a frozen peach margarita. Since my phone was on silent, I missed 3 calls from Little Man so after dinner, I called him back but it went straight to voicemail so I had to call EX to see what was up. He proceeds to tell me that he’s going to the ER because he has a migraine and was leaving Little Man here alone unless I came home. WTF??? So I asked to talked to my son and told him to get ready and I would have his grandparents pick him up. After arguing with Little Man because he said he would rather stay home alone, he said he would enjoy the quiet, EX finally says he isn’t going. Well yeah, why would you go to the ER and spend a $1000 to be told to take some ibuprofen, turn everything off, and sleep? It was like he was trying to ruin my date! What an ass!

After that debacle, my date and I drove to the movie theatre where the guy that might be my biological father calls to check on me. He gives me an excuse that he needed me to send him the email with the link to the test results (which should be ready by next Friday) and says he forgot that I was going out yet he was laughing as he says this! My date’s roommate called to check on him too and asked him for something lame as an excuse too (his house code?). So we finally go into the theatre, get our tickets (I had a free pass) and drinks (we both like Coke with light ice!), and I let him pick our seats. He immediately puts his arm around me and when I lean on him, he kisses my head. How sweet! We stayed cuddled up for the entire movie. I was cold so I had my jacket over us like a blanket.

So the movie was alright, I just thought it would be better. We walked out to my car (I drove in Houston since he’s not used to it), got in, and started making out. After about 10-15 minutes, I suggested we go somewhere else since security had driven by a couple of times and I totally missed the cars parked around us leaving. We drove back to my place and I parked behind his suv and we started kissing again. At 11pm, he says he should go home (we had been making out but not going inside clothes for about an hour). So I watched him drive off and parked my car where it belongs, and stayed there until he got home. We text for a bit after he got home, then for an hour this morning. We were talking and all of the sudden, he had to go and says later. Huh? What happened? But it’s all good, not like he was tired of me, he just had to go help his roommate.

It’s only been 2 dates, and I’m not getting laid, so why am I so happy? It’s not love, it hasn’t been long enough although I’m very on my way! I still say I’m smitten and he’s sending animated characters showing hearts and stuff. So we are silly sometimes. He says he likes that I’m not like most women and the weight is a non issue. He’s chunky with a beer belly but is really sweet and cute. I’m glad I met him and I plan on keeping going out with him.

So why is it that the minute Arizona says he misses me, I fall to pieces and end up talking to him for an hour this morning and I admit to myself that if one of us was serious about moving, it could work. It would have been nice to be with him but it just wasn’t working out long distance.


I fell asleep writing this earlier and after I woke up, I got a text from my date last night asking to now call him my boyfriend and he wants me to be his girlfriend! Wow! For anyone that thinks 2 dates is too fast, please remember that he and I were talking through most of December but we were both traveling and couldn’t meet before the 31st. So I did the right thing and told Arizona about my boyfriend and his reply is give it a try. He’s a great guy and I’m sure he will find a beautiful woman in Tucson that wants to be with a personal trainer/full time student.

Watched the Dallas Cowboys lose and watching the Denver Broncos fight with Indy. I hope they win at least, one of my teams needs to!

I’m ecstatically happy and can’t wait to see how long we can hold out on the sex thing and if this grows into love. We talked about waiting 6 dates before sex. We talked about 3 months before he meets Little Man. We talked about so many things, even about what our futures hold.